Think about the first 3 current goals that you have in mind and that you want to achieve.
What are the goals you are pursuing at this time?
Now think, for each one, why you want it . That is, what is the end result that attracts you to achieve that particular goal?
It turns out that, talking with a friend, who since I am number 3 on the Enneagram of Personality , we realized that being so goal-oriented, we forget to live and enjoy the things that really make us smile. and that make us feel good about ourselves.
So I decided to write this post because I think it is something that more people can relate to.
When we pause to ask ourselves why we are trying to achieve a certain goal , we will realize that many times the answer, basically, refers to one of the following results:
I think that to a greater or lesser extent, we are all attracted to the idea of ??gaining acceptance, recognition and approval from others; and to have some prestige, power and financial stability.
And this is not wrong … The risk is that when any of these factors becomes the end of what we are trying to achieve, we run the risk of abandoning ourselves in the process .
What do I mean?
Well, because we become so obsessed with ACHIEVING a certain goal or objective that we forget to ENJOY the process. And to enjoy life, go!
We end up becoming SLAVES to a goal that doesn’t necessarily make us wake up every day with a smile or feel good about ourselves.
That goal ends up being a DUTY that takes away from us the WANTING to do things out of a conviction much stronger than money, fame or power.
We become workaholics and maniacs on topics like productivity, success, and goal achievement; drowning in a vicious circle in which, even when there is progress, it will never be enough …
We make ourselves believe that when we achieve the next goal, now we will be happy, but the irony is that, when that happens, the feeling of emptiness returns and then we engineer that next “great goal”, forgetting to make a space to appreciate and thank everything what you have and what you have traveled.
Or on the contrary, when we do not see the progress we would like or we have failures along the way, we condemn ourselves by saying that if it does not come out the first time, it is not perfect or it does not meet our quality standards, it is time to quit. A strong blow to our self-esteem based 100% on merits …
What is happening?
That we do things for the wrong reason.
That most of our days we are doing things that respond to a GOAL and not to our HAPPINESS.
ACHIEVING becomes our banner and we forget to LIVE the only life we ??have; to enjoy the road as much as the destination.
That we put the goal first and our well-being behind; first the DUTY and then the BEING.
But the thing should be the other way around!
Acting like this is like putting our self-esteem on a wheel of fortune totally dependent on achievement, in which if you get it = you are worth it; but if you fail = you are not enough.
But when our focus stops being the goal and we start doing things because we really WANT, because we are PASSIONATE, and because it makes us HAPPY … everything takes on meaning, everything flows without any resistance and our life changes incredibly.
If you have identified with this, I recommend you pause and reflect on it. Put yourself in FIRST place and not last. Because when you pay attention to yourself and consent to doing the things you like, that engine of personal well-being is much stronger and more durable.
It happens to me that because I focus so much on ACHIEVING, I forget to live a full, healthy and spiritual life; You already know things like eating well, exercising, having hobbies, scheduling introspection and meditation times, living more with people I appreciate, etc.
But I’m starting to realize that when I do more of the things that make me feel good, my battery recharges and I perform much better in various aspects of my life. This is the key to persevering in any area: falling in love with the process rather than the goal itself .
When we focus on BEING and put ourselves as a priority, love for life becomes real and we will feel that urge to live a full, happy and meaningful life; regardless of whether it brings us fame, power, or money (that’s secondary!).
We have to break that ingrained belief that a happy life is a life of achievement, status, and recognition. Because we have already realized that it has not been like that … so why continue like this?
Remember that you are worth what you ARE. Not because of what you have, not because of what you get, not because of what you achieve.
Do things out of CONVICTION, not out of duty or having to do them – because you will feel it as an obligation and you will end up abandoning it when you feel it as another burden. As we already mentioned, WANTING to do things is an engine that never dies out and that is why it is much more sustainable in the long term.
So pause for the things that really make you feel good about yourself. That is the key to living a full and happy life.
There is no way to happiness: happiness is the way. – Wayne W. Dyer
Find something that gives your life real meaning and makes you wake up happy every morning. When you have a strong enough why , you will find a way to get there. I have this article that can serve as a guide at this point.
What matters at the end of the day is not the achievements, but the person you became in this path called life and how much you loved every moment of it.
Hey, Mark Ladd here. I am a sports fanatic and have a passion for this. Particularly running is what I love best. However, around 5 years ago I had an accident that changed my life. I can no longer pursue those sporting activities, so I moved my focus on a different approach where I blog about the sports and other areas of life which I have grown to appreciate more since my accident.Click to read on